NOTE: Guild Wars 2 and all its lovely IP doesn’t belong to me at all. This is entirely a fan-based work and is in no way officially associated with ArenaNet or Guild Wars 2. It is created for my own amusement, that’s all. Long live Guild Wars 2!
We come in ‘fore the sun can rise,
work all day, then we work all night!
Ask any krewe what they would devise
all for the Eternal Alchemy.
You call that work, I am suprised.
A golem could better strategize.
Leave this magic to wiser guys
and we’ll show youuuu the right way!
Greet the hydro-spherical bauble,
program golems to clean up from last night,
check on the partial fungal globule,
alter the current and blow out the lab lights!
(Flee from the failed experiments!)
We blew out lights before you were born!
Fungal globs? We’re beyond that now!
Ask any genius worth his goggles,
and you’ll understand why I wear this hat!
You’re outdated, your methods faulty,
don’t even get Magical Technology!
Walk away while you still can totter!
We need to… We need to…
[Claxons sounding]
When you tweak
The magna coil
You will break
The bookah
This is my lab, you had your chance,
now scram before I call in the Norn.
Go play genius somewhere else
and let the next gen work now!
Tweak the dis-combobulator,
gyro the helix firing mechanism,
I’ll show you, you skritt-brained crone.
Ignore the bookah screaming in the yard.
You’re doing it wrong, it’s pathetic now!
I cringe to think how your parents blush.
To think they let YOU through the college ranks!
pity the Eternal Alchemy!