Plot It Out

A parody of Shake It Off
Lyrics by me.

Get the words down on the page, try not to be vague
That’s what mentors say, mmm hmm, that’s what mentors say, mmm hmm
Don’t use passive voice, commas aren’t a choice
At least that’s what mentors say mmm mmm, that’s what mentors say mmm mmm
But I keep writing, can’t stop, won’t stop typing
It’s like I got this story in my mind, sayin’ you’ve got tell it all
‘Cause the voice has gotta pop, pop, pop, pop, pop
Or the story’s gonna flop, flop, flop, flop, flop
Baby, I’m just gonna plot, plot, plot, plot, plot
I plot it out, I plot it out
The end is kinda not, not, not, not, not
Prologue gettin chopped, chopped, chopped, chopped, chopped
Baby, I’m just gonna plot, plot, plot, plot, plot
I plot it out, I plot it out
I’ll never miss a scene, there really has to be a theme
And that’s what they don’t see oh no, that’s what they don’t see oh no
I’m pantsing on my own (pantsing on my own), I’ll make the arc up as I go (arc up as I go)
And that’s when they say no mmm mmm, that’s when they say no mmm mmm
But I keep writing, can’t stop, won’t stop typing
It’s like I got this world in my mind just waiting to be signed
‘Cause the villain’s gettin fought, fought, fought, fought, fought
The MC’s got a shot, shot, shot, shot, shot
Baby, I’m just gonna plot, plot, plot, plot, plot
I plot it out, I plot it out
Wordcount’s gotta drop, drop, drop, drop, drop
Adverbs I gotta crop, crop, crop, crop, crop
Baby, I’m just gonna plot, plot, plot, plot, plot
I plot it out, I plot it out
I plot it out, I plot it out…
Hey, hey, hey
Just think while you’ve been getting down and out about the edits and the dirty, dirty typos in the prose
You could have been using this beat sheet
My CP bought this new craft book
She’s like “oh my God”, but I’m just gonna plot it
And to the beta reader there with the hella good flair
Won’t you read my novel, baby, we can plot, plot, plot, yeah oh
‘Cause the mentors gonna spot, spot, spot, spot, spot
And the agents gonna shop, shop, shop, shop, shop (agents gonna shop yo)
Baby, I’m just gonna plot, plot, plot, plot, plot
I plot it out, I plot it out
Protag’s kinda hawt, hawt, hawt, hawt, hawt
And the query hurts alot, lot, lot, lot, lot (the query hurts)
Baby, I’m just gonna plot, plot, plot, plot, plot
I plot it out, I plot it out
I plot it out, I plot it out…